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A Joke for You

Peckers

An Alaskan woodpecker and a Texas woodpecker were in Alaska arguing about which state had the toughest trees to peck.

The Alaska woodpecker said they had a tree that no woodpecker can peck. The Texas woodpecker challenged him and was able to peck a hole in the tree with no problem. The Alaskan woodpecker was in awe.

The Texas woodpecker challenged the Alaskan woodpecker to peck a tree in Texas no woodpecker has been able to peck successfully. The Alaskan woodpecker expressed confidence that he could do it.

After flying to Texas and successfully pecking the tree in Texas, the two woodpeckers couldn't figure out why the Texas woodpecker was able to peck the Alaska tree and the Alaska woodpecker was able to peck the Texas tree when neither one was able to peck the tree in their own state.

After thinking for some time they both came to the same conclusion: Your pecker is always harder when you're away from home.



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Last Updated: 7/4/09 3:08pm

1. Life is Short..Deny YourSelf Nothing ··· Are you looking for a Lady whom is Unrushed..Sexy...Enjoys being with her dates...and LOVES to kiss and cuddle???? Look no further! You found whom you are looking for! I am very discreet..sexy..tall..toned and tanned and I enjoy the company of upscale Gents. Feel free to visit my site for all info on how to meet with me:)Have a great day and I hope to see you soon! ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · [ Dayton and surrounding ar ] Hits In: 1276 Hits Out: 219 monique

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5. Hot, Young and Sexy ··· Hello gentlemen allow me to introduce myself I am Sugar an independent provider in the Cleveland area. I am smart sexy and that of a soft sweet playful vixen I am open minded and love to play very passionate and love to give you great ecstasy pleasures. I know what you want and would love to take you to that special place each and every time we meet. I'd lobe to meet you and make you one of my friends I also have friends who would love to join us or just for some variety of fun come enjoy yourself in the EXECUTIVES PARADISE I'll be waiting for you don't tease yourself please yourself. Please contact me by calling me at(216) 326-2019 or 216 272-8561. I also respond to e-mails and set time appointments ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO [ Cleveland (440),(330) all suburbs ] Hits In: 13 Hits Out: 92 sugar

6. Spice up your week with a Sweet 'n Sexy Treat ··· I'm 27, a petite 5'3", 110 lbs, 34D-26-34...tanned, toned, tight, manicured and immaculately maintained. I've got sparkling blue eyes, long silky brown hair and a smooth tan complexion year round! I love what I do, and you will be able to tell the difference. I am sensual, sexy, and most of all I'll make you feel relaxed and at ease. You will experience an unrushed encounter with someone who prides themselves in giving you pleasure! Give me a call and let me be your dream come true for many evenings to come... ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO [ South Dayton Area ] Hits In: 12 Hits Out: 149 anna

7. Your Satisfaction Is My Goal ··· Gentlemen, Are you looking for a fun filled wonderful time like no other? I am willing and able to give that to you. I go the extra mile to satisfy your wants needs and desires! I provide the ultimate GFE experience. I have many skills and abilities. I am always willing to try new things. One of the things I love to do most is spend time with respectful, discreet gentlemen! I have a discreet incall location. I have brown hair with highlights, green eyes, all natural 38D, and I am shaven. I will make sure to put a smile on your face! And leave you wanting more till we meet again. Please wait no longer, satisfaction is waiting for you!! ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · [ Dayton ] Hits In: 12 Hits Out: 258 brandi

8. Hey Handsome.... I am waiting to melt in your arms... ··· I cater to the mature gentlemen, however, age is just a number.*wink* I offer a very enjoyable GFE environment and there is nothing fake about my reactions to your advances. Yes, gentlemen, I am a squirter. I promise you won't be disappointed and you will definitely cum back for more!Why not give me the pleasure of melting in your arms?? Drop me an email or visit my webpage. I do travel thru Ohio, Michigan, Indiana, Kentucky and Illinois, check my calander! ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO [ 513, 937, 812, 859 ] Hits In: 11 Hits Out: 191 katy

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11. Satisfy your needs ··· sensual erotic full body massage and play date. I am a mature fun loving lady, who loves life. I have been a provider in the cleveland area for about 5 years. I have never met a person I haven't liked. I choose to work on a comfort level. I do not charge or accept gifts in return for sex. ( everyone is not for everyone) Every session is catered to that client's needs & wants. I offer in or outcall services at the same low rate with no hidden fees. It is best to try to schedule a day in advance, but I usually have same day appointments available. I hope you enjoy your visit to my little corner of the world. I am available every day from 8 am. ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · [ Cleveland Akron Ohio ] Hits In: 7 Hits Out: 149 ambers

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20. Busty Blonde Beauty xXxtreme GFE ··· I am a sensuous busty blonde beauty just waiting to wrap u sensuality and charm. I am based in Ohio and travel the entire state. I also tour Pennsylvania, Indiana, Illinois, Kentucky, West Virginia, Michigan, and Virginia. *watch my website calendar for my travels* I enjoy the company of mature and respectful men that know how to treat a lady and can enjoy ALL that she has to offer. I do offer a special discount for those that can take the time to prebook a session. Check out my reviews listed on several sites and email me to plan OUR fun! I am eager to begin OUR journey! ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO [ Columbus (travels to other states) ] Hits In: 1 Hits Out: 137 lovelyg


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MATURE SEXY GFE-ATTRACTIVE-AGE 50-Columbus, baby! ··· Age 50, very sexy size 12, mature no-drama, blonde, 36DD-28-38, Let's spend an entire evening together, wining, dining, dancing, followed by making out like we were in high school and then giving into the temptations that the evening brought forth ...I am intelligent and articulate, appreciative and gracious thus making me the perfect date. Please read my reviews on my site. ·· · E-MAIL · WEBSITE · · ( Ohio · 614 - 513 - 740 - 419 ) ( Hits In:1 * Hits Out:1041 )

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Tall...Blonde..Sweet and Sensuous ··· Hello Gentlemen, Looking for a discreet, sensuous provider whom is a true GFE? You found your lady!Feel free to visit my site and have a great day! ·· · E-MAIL · WEBSITE · · ( Ohio · 937 ) ( Hits In:1 * Hits Out:570 )

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46DD BBW 'Girlfriend' - Mature woman will pamper and spoil you! ··· I've been called the 'perfect' girlfriend...no rush..no hassles, no drama of the traditional relationship...just all the good stuff!Mature enough to know what I'm doing and boy do I love it! Your time with me is a haven from the outside world stress free, relaxing and oh so pleasurable! Reviews on national boards are linked from my site. Fastest contact is by phone: 216-324-9288. Let this 'cookie' make you crumble! Can't wait to meet you! xoxoxo Cookie ··· ·· · E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO · ( Ohio · 216, 440 ) ( Hits In:1 * Hits Out:433 )

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Hey Handsome! I am waiting to melt in your arms.... ··· I cater to the mature gentlemen, however, age is just a number.*wink* I offer a very enjoyable GFE envirorment and there is nothing fake about my reactions to your advances. Yes, gentlemen, I am a squirter. I promise you won't be disappointed and you will definitely cum back for more!Why not give me the pleasure of melting in your arms?? Drop me an email or visit my webpage. I do travel thru Ohio, Michigan, Indiana, Kentucky and Illinois, check my calander! ·· · E-MAIL · WEBSITE · · ( Ohio · 513, 937 ) ( Hits In:1 * Hits Out:814 )

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1. ( ) YOUR PRIVATE SEXY COMPANION ··· SEXY.. AFFECTIONATE DISCREET LADY HEIGHT: 5'8 WEIGHT: 170 HAIR: BROWN EYES: BROWN MEASUREMENTS: 38DD AGE: 39 ··· E-MAIL WEBSITE PHOTO · Hits: In: 11 / Out: 441

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2. ( Cleveland/Akron ) Seduction... Eroticism... CARNAL SATISFACTION! ··· I'm a fiery well reviewed alluring BBW well versed in the art of erotic fulfillment... I'm well endowed with 44 EEs and curves that you will love to trace your hands over again & again... I have a Mocha-complexion that radiates from my 5'4" soft voluptuous BBW frame... Discreet, open-minded, and absolutely Precious! Along with my erotic charms I am exceptionally cultured and thoroughly educated with several degrees. I can hold stimulating conversations (Stimulating in more than a few ways) for that special man who desires arousing discourse before, after, or during his main "course"... I am the real GFE deal! If a momentary escape to bliss with a sultry vivacious woman is what you desire... Let's arrange our getaway! Looking forward to experience you & many luscious things, xoxox Carissa ··· E-MAIL WEBSITE PHOTO · Hits: In: 2 / Out: 309

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3. ( 330 youngstown ) Sexy Plus Size Tabitha in youngstown! ··· Beautiful 23 year old escort in youngstown! I am 5'8, PLus Sized not quite bbw, with 38DD's that r sure to please! Blonde hair green eyes, clear skin & a killer smile...a mouth that will drive u crzy...please email or call 330-261-6354 for some pictures...i unfortunatly dont have a website up at this time...PLease contact for rates and any other info ud like! Cant wait to c u! xoxox Tabitha ··· E-MAIL · Hits: In: 1 / Out: 18

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4. ( Greater Cleveland ) Mature, busty and waiting for you! ··· I've been called the perfect 'girlfriend'. No rush, no hassle, no 'ties' of the traditional relationship...just all the good stuff! If you would enjoy being pampered, spoiled and teased by a mature woman who definitely knows what she is doing... If you would enjoy a relaxing escape from the everyday, hectic 'real world'... You owe it to yourself to spend some time with me! Reasonable rates and very well reviewed on national boards. Links are on my website. Come see for yourself what those gentlemen already know ;) Let this 'Cookie' make you crumble... I promise you won't be sorry! xoxoxo Cookie 216-324-9288 ··· E-MAIL WEBSITE PHOTO · Hits: In: 1 / Out: 324

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COME ON MY ISLAND ··· escape with chyna your hawaiian and black beauty. Enjoy entertainment at it's finest! companionship, exotic massage, private shows, etc. I'm busty, beautiful and bossy! Private residence, discrete and professional. If you ready for a romantic relax peaceful evening, look no further. I got what you want and what you have been longing for. Honey glow skin, soft full lips, very busty, and hips that will get you hooked! · columbus, oh ·· · WEBSITE · PHOTO · Hits: In: 1 / Out: 287
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