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A Joke for You
I was a very happy person.
My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and we decided to get married.
There was only one little thing bothering me ... it was her beautiful younger sister. She was twenty-two, tight miniskirts, generally braless. She would bend down when near me, and I always got more than a pleasant view. She never did it when she was near anyone else.
One day "little" sister phoned and asked me to come over.
She was alone when I arrived, and she whispered to me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I committed my life to her sister.
I was in total shock, and couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want one last wild fling, just come up and get me.
When she reached the top she pulled off her panties and threw them down the stairs. I stood there for a moment, then turned and made a beeline straight to the front door. I opened the door, and headed straight towards my car.
Lo and behold, my entire future family was standing outside, all clapping!
With tears in his eyes, my father-in-law hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test... we couldn't ask for better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."
And the moral of this story is: Always keep your condoms in your car!

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N E W S : Dave of Erotic Review (TER) is in jail. "Warning of many false reviews on TER (The Erotic Reviews) Not to Mention Cops and Stings and Abusive Owner of TER As a Provider Calls him, 'Worst Kind of Male Predator - Dave of TER' TER (The Erotic Review) is A Disgrace to Sexworkers" Go read about it

11. ( Massachusetts · 617,603 ) Seductively sweet busty blond... ··· I am a beautiful with brown/blonde hair, intelligent, witty, with a fabulous sense of style & humor. I am a 38DD-27-39, with soft, tanned skin. I love to laugh. After a few moments with me, you'll realize that I'm very sweet, sexy, sensual, fun loving, & completely down to earth. I provide and unrushed GFE session. I will be available in Maine, New Hampshire and Massachusetts. For more information please e-mail me. Pics and information will be provided promptly. Or call 617-460-6489 ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO ( Massachusetts · 617,603 ) ( Hits In: 1 Hits Out: 168 )jordan30

33. ( EasternPennsylvania · 610 215 ) looking to please . . . . ··· i am in the Montgomery County of Pa. will travel if necessary to surrounding counties. I like pleasing a man and enjoy lots of things that other escorts don't. i am willing to come to you or you can come to me - but meeting in a neutral setting first is a must either way! i have the desire to make you feel special! once again, i love things that most ladies here might not even know about. try me! ··· E-MAIL · · ( EasternPennsylvania · 610 215 ) ( Hits In: 1 Hits Out: 33 )lac8226

34. ( EasternPennsylvania · 717 ) Last 3 Months to See Me!! ··· Perhaps we've visited in the past and you've been trying to find time to see me again or perhaps you've always wanted to but just never got the chance or the moxy now's your chance! I will be retiring the end of Nov 2008 to begin the clinical portion of my studies. If we haven't met before you should know that I'm a 5'0" 119lb sometimes blonde, sometimes strawberry blonde with blue eyes , a soft voice , 34/27/35 . I'm 35 years old though I often get pegged for being 10 years younger. I love what I do and yes,, I do giggle :) ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO ( EasternPennsylvania · 717 ) ( Hits In: 1 Hits Out: 1138 )xgidget

14. ( Illinois · chicago ) Leeza in Chicago ··· Nothing but pure delight awaits the discriminating gentleman. 26 yrs old, 5'9", 130 lbs 36D-26-34 American Indian, Spanish, Black. Available for in and out calls, fetishes, domination massage, one-on-one entertainment and parties. Email me and let's party. ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · ( Illinois · chicago ) ( Hits In: 1 Hits Out: 56 )leeza

3. ( WVirginia · WV,OH,PA,VA, KY, MD, NY ) Dyvine ~Uninhibited Pleasures~ ··· I am an uninhibited, sensually oriented companion that loves overindulging you in your fantasies and loves to be your temptress playmate. A Bi Rubenesque cutie, long shapely legs, full hips and a tempting rear-end. You will find me to be very open-minded, easy to talk to, sensitive to your specific desires and quite passionate.I love what I do and do what I love, French, Greek, Asian, MSOG, Fetishes... let me show you just how much... Available locally to Parkersburg/Charleston/Clarksburg/Wheeling, WV & Marietta, OH and to travel to you. I enjoy the company of Gentlemen, Ladies & Couples, see me one on one or with one of my girlfriends.Frequent tours in OH/PA/KY/DC/NY/MD/VA/IN/NC/TN and various major cities in the US. Discretion is my 1st priority. ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO ( WVirginia · WV,OH,PA,VA, KY, MD, NY ) ( Hits In: 1 Hits Out: 76 )ddelight

38. ( NewJersey · 973, 732, 201 ) Roxanne ··· 100% Sexy and Beautiful 100% Genuine pictures 100% VIP service Always discreet and ready for anything. Experience the best. I enjoy being in good company, shopping, trying new things and having fun. I take great care of my appearance and will always be appropriately dressed for the occasion. I have a varied wardrobe catering to all your fantasies, i.e.. French maid, nurse, school girl, leather-wear, rubber, PVC and exquisite Lingerie. I offer my services on an in/outcall basis. For more details and plenty of photos, please visit my website. ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · ( NewJersey · 973, 732, 201 ) ( Hits In: 1 Hits Out: 1548 )roxnj

27. ( NYMetro · 212 ) Power Models NY ··· Power Models is dedicated to providing our clientele with the most reputable, prestigious and glamorous service available. We strive to maintain the highest standards in the escort industry and will not sacrifice on quality. Our telephone personnel is courteous and straightforward and will help you book a date that will totally satisfy those accustomed to the highest standards. ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO ( NYMetro · 212 ) ( Hits In: 1 Hits Out: 76 )pwrmdlsn

13. ( Florida_Central · 321, 407 ) Exotic Discreet Companion ··· A Companion to the Discerning Gentleman who appreciates a Real Woman = 38DD-30-38, Sexy, Exotic Latina-Black mix (Central America). I look as young as 25, but I'm older & much wiser. After spending time with me, you'll be begging for another session! I don't have a website yet, but feel free to enjoy a photo or two! Looking forward to meeting you soon! -Marisa :) ··· E-MAIL · · PHOTO ( Florida_Central · 321, 407 ) ( Hits In: 1 Hits Out: 13 )exotiq

2. ( Minnesota · Minneapolis/Bloomington ) Sexy Tall Redhead ··· Sexy, intelligent, 5'8", 38D, long auburn hair available for companionship, fun, conversation, laughter, dining and relaxing times. **SCREENING IS REQUIRED*** so please fill out the screening form on my website, www.sexyredheadmn.com. I travel frequently so check out my calendar and tours page as well. ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO ( Minnesota · Minneapolis/Bloomington ) ( Hits In: 1 Hits Out: 90 )hotbabe

10. ( TX_Dallas · Dallas, Ft. Worth ) Hannah of Dallas - Elite private companion ··· Standing 5'7" and measuring 34FF-25-35 and 124lbs, Hannah of Dallas is an elite choice of companionship for gentlemen who wish to treat themselves to the very best. A current model who travels often to NYC, Miami, and Los Angeles, Hannah has been featured in music videos, Playboy Lingerie magazine, and has modeled extensively for Hawaiian Tropic, Venus Swimwear, Harlequin Romance, Coca Cola, and many others. With long, silky blonde hair and blue-green eyes, this slender, college-educated beauty will set a new standard for companionship within minutes of arrival. Shattering stereotypes, Hannah's impeccable appearance combined with her charming intellect prove that beauty and brains come in one exquisite package! Hannah has a delicious sense of eroticism that will captivate you, making you crave her presence long after you say goodbye. ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · ( TX_Dallas · Dallas, Ft. Worth ) ( Hits In: 1 Hits Out: 47 )682

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<center><b>Giving Head?</b></center><br>
<font size=2>Okay men I've read alot of ads claiming you give good head but when an actual hook up occurs some of you don't have the slighest clue in hell as to what it is you are doing. And just because you love giving head doesn't mean you give it well so here are 5 small tips to help you and your lady out...
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1.) There is more to it than the clit: The clit isn't the only part of the vagina that loves attention during 69. The vagina isn't just for your dick. So stop ignoring it. Put your finger(s) in it, use a vibrator, a carrot (not my thing but I thought I'd throw it out there), something, ANYTHING but play in it please. I mean for crying out loud your face is covered in lady juices so why are you afraid of getting your hands dirty?
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2.) You have options: Speaking of the clit, there are more sensations we like other than you flicking it with the tip of your tounge. Suck it, bite it (not too hard- I can not stress this enough) or agian use your hands and give it a little break so she doesn't orgasm in 30 seconds or less. Alternate and repeat. Do you like it when a woman just bobs up and down on your dick with her mouth and nothing else or do you like it when she sucks the whole thing, then just the tip, licks it, grabs it and jacks you off while sucking it and plays with your balls? We like a little variety too.
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3.) Rug Burn = No fun: Shave your face or at the very least trim your mustache. No woman on this entire planet thinks having rug burn on her inner thighs is col. We do have to get up and go to work/school/shop when you are done. We need to be able to walk without being in constant pain. Not being able to walk because of the earth shattering orgasm one thing and is totally diferent than being in pain because our thighs are chaffing.
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4.) Her thighs are not there just to get in the way: You don't just have to rush right in and start going at it like you're starving, kissing a ladies thighs can only go one of two ways- a. it'll turn her on even more or b. she's laugh like crazy cause it tickles, either way its fun so stop using them to prop yourself up. Rub them while you're eating her out, grab them and pull her legs open but just stop pretending like they aren't there. They are an erogenous zone.
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5.) Its not going to break: There are some men who eat pussy like if they get too close or too into it its going to break. You do this too when having sex. If your lady likes it a bit harder during sex she probably wouldn't mind you losing yourself and letting go when your face is in between her legs. Bury your face in there, swim around, come up for air and then dive back in. The vagina is attached. It will not break, it will not come off, it will not need to go in and be redetailed if you bang it up a bit with your mouth so stop treating it like a new Sabb and rough it up a bit. Touch it and act like you love doing it. If you say you love eating pussy then EAT IT don't just taste test it.
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