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A Joke for You

A 65 year old man goes to his doctor and says. "Doc, I have a problem. My girlfriend is sleeping over this Friday, My ex-wife is sleeping over this Saturday and my wife is coming home Sunday. I need 3 Viagra pills to satisfy them all".

The doctor says " You know 3 Viagra pills 3 nights in a row is pretty dangerous for a man of your age". "I will give them to you on the condition that you return to my office on Monday so that I can check you out."

The man says "You have a deal Doc." Monday morning the man returns with his arm in a sling. The doctor says "What happened"?

The man answered "Nobody showed up!"



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N E W S : Dave of Erotic Review (TER) is in jail. "Warning of many false reviews on TER (The Erotic Reviews) Not to Mention Cops and Stings and Abusive Owner of TER As a Provider Calls him, 'Worst Kind of Male Predator - Dave of TER' TER (The Erotic Review) is A Disgrace to Sexworkers" Go read about it

4. ( California_SF · 415 ) Summer ··· Summertime fun, can be done, with a thin 40 something athletic blonde, who is 5'6", 136 lbs. and 35B-27-36. I am very accommodating and sweet, with a hypnotic voice. I can read your mind or at least I know what's on it. So let's get together and play. Call me at (415) 652-9760. I am located in San Francisco. ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO ( California_SF · 415 ) ( Hits In: 2 Hits Out: 34 )lovemiyo

9. ( California_LA · 818 and 310 ) On my Knees and Eager to Please ··· Busty, blonde, blue-eyed beauty with great legs, great smile, seductive eyes and an eagerness to please. I love my work and you will agree. Dates with couples are my favorite dates. I am a genuine, honest, and enthusiastic adult entertainer. I provide a relaxing environment complete with cocktails, shower, movies, private lap dance. I love to role play and can be an intelligent, classy dinner date or can give you that submissive, trash talking slut experience that so many of you fantasize about. You won't be disappointed. Most new clients are back for a second date within 3 weeks. I am on my knees looking up at you waiting for my instructions on how to please you... ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO ( California_LA · 818 and 310 ) ( Hits In: 2 Hits Out: 94 )coolgirl

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5. ( California_SF · San Francisco/Travel ) San Francisco Escort Krystal ··· ***EXCLUSIVE VIP ELITE COMPANION*** As a Companion to the Affluent, I am an elegant yet down to earth woman sharing my suitors discerning tastes and lusts for fun, excitement, adventure, travel, fashion, design, beauty, health, and the arts and antiques. Sumptuous feminine companionship and fine attention to detail grace each rendezvous. Provocatively I am designed by nature for the appreciative playful Connoisseur of erotic seduction, succulent indulgences and luxurious interludes of passionate pampering. Selectively available for the Most Discerning Gentleman possessing Old World Gentlemanly Ways (You,?) inspired by stimulation of both body AND mind, a sincerely warm invitation is extended for you to visit my website for further introduction.***voicemail***1-800-238-6152*** ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO ( California_SF · San Francisco/Travel ) ( Hits In: 2 Hits Out: 39 )krystal

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11. ( Illinois · NW Chicago bartlett area ) DENISE ··· I am a Native American Indian. I attended the Lauterstein-Conway Massage School and Clinic. I offer A full Hour massage, Long Relaxing Sensual massage. I am located in the Streamwood and Bartlett area right across from Villa Olivia.(NW Chicago.IL) Very Private and Safe Neighborhood. YOU will enjoy each moment, Just what your body and mind has been looking for. To book an appointment please e-mail me or call (630) 853-5196. ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · ( Illinois · NW Chicago bartlett area ) ( Hits In: 1 Hits Out: 179 )pamperme


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<center><b>Giving Head?</b></center><br>
<font size=2>Okay men I've read alot of ads claiming you give good head but when an actual hook up occurs some of you don't have the slighest clue in hell as to what it is you are doing. And just because you love giving head doesn't mean you give it well so here are 5 small tips to help you and your lady out...
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1.) There is more to it than the clit: The clit isn't the only part of the vagina that loves attention during 69. The vagina isn't just for your dick. So stop ignoring it. Put your finger(s) in it, use a vibrator, a carrot (not my thing but I thought I'd throw it out there), something, ANYTHING but play in it please. I mean for crying out loud your face is covered in lady juices so why are you afraid of getting your hands dirty?
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2.) You have options: Speaking of the clit, there are more sensations we like other than you flicking it with the tip of your tounge. Suck it, bite it (not too hard- I can not stress this enough) or agian use your hands and give it a little break so she doesn't orgasm in 30 seconds or less. Alternate and repeat. Do you like it when a woman just bobs up and down on your dick with her mouth and nothing else or do you like it when she sucks the whole thing, then just the tip, licks it, grabs it and jacks you off while sucking it and plays with your balls? We like a little variety too.
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3.) Rug Burn = No fun: Shave your face or at the very least trim your mustache. No woman on this entire planet thinks having rug burn on her inner thighs is col. We do have to get up and go to work/school/shop when you are done. We need to be able to walk without being in constant pain. Not being able to walk because of the earth shattering orgasm one thing and is totally diferent than being in pain because our thighs are chaffing.
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4.) Her thighs are not there just to get in the way: You don't just have to rush right in and start going at it like you're starving, kissing a ladies thighs can only go one of two ways- a. it'll turn her on even more or b. she's laugh like crazy cause it tickles, either way its fun so stop using them to prop yourself up. Rub them while you're eating her out, grab them and pull her legs open but just stop pretending like they aren't there. They are an erogenous zone.
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5.) Its not going to break: There are some men who eat pussy like if they get too close or too into it its going to break. You do this too when having sex. If your lady likes it a bit harder during sex she probably wouldn't mind you losing yourself and letting go when your face is in between her legs. Bury your face in there, swim around, come up for air and then dive back in. The vagina is attached. It will not break, it will not come off, it will not need to go in and be redetailed if you bang it up a bit with your mouth so stop treating it like a new Sabb and rough it up a bit. Touch it and act like you love doing it. If you say you love eating pussy then EAT IT don't just taste test it.
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