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A Joke for You

Did you hear the one where the husband comes home so very late at night, and the wife is standing at the door with the question: "Well, what excuse have you this time for coming home at this hour of the night?" Hubby: "Well, my dear, I was playing golf with friends." Wife: "What? Where could you play golf at 2:00 a.m.?" Hubby: "We were using night clubs!"



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N E W S : Dave of Erotic Review (TER) is in jail. "Warning of many false reviews on TER (The Erotic Reviews) Not to Mention Cops and Stings and Abusive Owner of TER As a Provider Calls him, 'Worst Kind of Male Predator - Dave of TER' TER (The Erotic Review) is A Disgrace to Sexworkers" Go read about it

1. ( Minnesota · Twin Cities/Metro/South of the River ) Always a good time :) ··· Chubby cutie with a lot to offer! Fun, smart, sexy and well worth the time! I can provide stimulating conversation, advice, creative time fillers, and more! If you're low on funds but need someone to hang with--I'm your girl, as well. I'm open-minded, so you can be honest and candid! I have a great sense of humor to offer, as well as many other things! ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO ( Minnesota · Twin Cities/Metro/South of the River ) ( Hits In: 3 Hits Out: 107 )anaislou

7. ( Georgia · Atlanta ) Unwrap a Piece of Candy ··· I'm available day or night with just a few hours notice. I consider myself open minded and very down to earth, so you will have no problem getting comfortable with me. Just for an hour or an fun-tasy filled evening out, I will be sure to give you a very satisifing time. Call or Email me for my rate for an overnite/extended stay. Please check out my web site for more pics and info. http://wakeup.to/candygirlkym ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · ( Georgia · Atlanta ) ( Hits In: 3 Hits Out: 126 )candykym

28. ( NewJersey · 973 908 ) Hi I'm Cindy. I am back from vacation! And I am ready for you! ··· I'm a friendly strawberry blonde, blue eyes. I'm slim and white 36D-24-36 I'd love to get together if you are in the area. Cell phone 201-400-8896. ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO ( NewJersey · 973 908 ) ( Hits In: 3 Hits Out: 479 )cindy111

29. ( NewJersey · 856, 609, 215, 610 ) LadyBJ Is BACK In SNJ! ··· Mature, Independent, Adventurous female... Well established, well reviewed. Offering the Finest in Birdwatching, Facepainting and Russian. Incall only in a private, discrete and very convenient location in the Camden/Burlington County area. Please check my site for details and updates. Join my Yahoo Group (link on my site!)for some XX Pix & Videos XX..Seeing IS believing! Let me show you what I can do for you! ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · ( NewJersey · 856, 609, 215, 610 ) ( Hits In: 3 Hits Out: 1303 )ladybj

6. ( Illinois · Chicago ) Ahvani... An Experience That Will Last A Lifetime ··· I'm a stunning, exotic and very erotic beauty of African American, Asian & Caucasian descent. Meticulously polished from head to toe. A small framed, well defined but toned body, size 1, 34C-22-32, weigh 100 lbs. free of all stretch marks, scars and tattoos. Big mysterious brown eyes full pouty lips and a white smile that is sure to brighten your day. Seductive and elegant yet sexy and alluring. I'm a great person to talk to and have around on those lonely nights... very laid back and friendly. Uninhibited, open-minded, honest and nonjudgmental. Your time with me is never rushed. I take pride in providing a unique, satisfying and memorable experience. Don't overlook this rare, true Girlfriend Experience... ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO ( Illinois · Chicago ) ( Hits In: 3 Hits Out: 74 )ahvani

4. ( Wisconsin · Far Southwest Wisconsin, Dubuque Iowa ) Spend some No Rush Quality time with this Classy Lady ··· Hello Gentlemen, I am Diana. Luscious BBW with a flare for giving you the most for your time spent with me. I am 40 years old, but said to look early to mid 30's. I stand at 5'3" and 165 lbs. My hair is shoulder length and is curly or straight depending on my moods. My eyes change from deep blue to icy gray, also depending on my moods. I am a good conversationalist and love to listen to you talk, or just sit in close proximity of you and listen to the wind blow, or the trees sway. I am in no way rushed, and like to take my time getting to know you. A glass of wine, dinner at a fine restauraunt, or just staring into each others eyes. What more can a ladi ask for than your fine company and a beautiful night to share it under? I await with breathless anticipation. ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO ( Wisconsin · Far Southwest Wisconsin, Dubuque Iowa ) ( Hits In: 3 Hits Out: 98 )ladidi

30. ( NewJersey · 732, 908 ) Reiko's Playhouse ··· Exotic Asian. Petite, 34B-28-38, extremely professional and attractive. I am warm, wet and wonderful (W3). GFE/Outcall only for Central NJ. If interested, please introduce yourself by e-mail! I look forward to meeting and hearing from mature, discriminating gentlemen... Discretion Assured & Expected. Please e-mail me for more info. ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO ( NewJersey · 732, 908 ) ( Hits In: 3 Hits Out: 378 )reiko

19. ( NYMetro · ) Mari Ann ··· If you can handle a German Hottie that will captivate you with sensuality, then you need to grab an energy drink and give me a call. I'm definitely a knockout babe and will make you yearning for more They say German girls are the best. Let me prove that to you! 25 years old - H: 5'7 W: 125 lbs. German - 34C-24-34 Call for Appointment (800) 380-5052 Servicing NYC Metro Area (NYC/NJ/CT) - 30 Minutes Arrival Time Check my reviews on TER http://www.theeroticreview.com/reviews/show.asp?id=48388 ··· · WEBSITE · PHOTO ( NYMetro · ) ( Hits In: 3 Hits Out: 168 )tantiba1

4. ( Colorado · Colorado Springs, Denver ) Melissa Sterling - Erotic Angel and Escort ··· If you are looking for a discreet professional relationship to explore your fantasies or just for company, look no further. I provide superior quality GFE companionship and I love to see you smile. How about creating one of life's pinnacle experiences with me right away? ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO ( Colorado · Colorado Springs, Denver ) ( Hits In: 3 Hits Out: 45 )sterling

6. ( Tennessee · 901 and 662 ) Sarah of Memphis! Sexy, Upscale, and HOT! ··· I'm Sarah your dream girl. I am 5'3, 115 lbs, honey brown eyes and hair, soft olive skin, and petite curves in all the right places. So stop all the hesitating and debating and come see me... Sarah of Memphis. I love meeting new men ... It is sooo exciting. If you have been looking for an intimate companion and couldn't find the woman for you. Call me. I am good in any situation from social calls to bedroom calls :) You wont find a provider who can give you all that you need... except me. 901-483-0326. ··· E-MAIL · WEBSITE · PHOTO ( Tennessee · 901 and 662 ) ( Hits In: 3 Hits Out: 67 )sarahlee


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<center><b>Giving Head?</b></center><br>
<font size=2>Okay men I've read alot of ads claiming you give good head but when an actual hook up occurs some of you don't have the slighest clue in hell as to what it is you are doing. And just because you love giving head doesn't mean you give it well so here are 5 small tips to help you and your lady out...
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1.) There is more to it than the clit: The clit isn't the only part of the vagina that loves attention during 69. The vagina isn't just for your dick. So stop ignoring it. Put your finger(s) in it, use a vibrator, a carrot (not my thing but I thought I'd throw it out there), something, ANYTHING but play in it please. I mean for crying out loud your face is covered in lady juices so why are you afraid of getting your hands dirty?
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2.) You have options: Speaking of the clit, there are more sensations we like other than you flicking it with the tip of your tounge. Suck it, bite it (not too hard- I can not stress this enough) or agian use your hands and give it a little break so she doesn't orgasm in 30 seconds or less. Alternate and repeat. Do you like it when a woman just bobs up and down on your dick with her mouth and nothing else or do you like it when she sucks the whole thing, then just the tip, licks it, grabs it and jacks you off while sucking it and plays with your balls? We like a little variety too.
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3.) Rug Burn = No fun: Shave your face or at the very least trim your mustache. No woman on this entire planet thinks having rug burn on her inner thighs is col. We do have to get up and go to work/school/shop when you are done. We need to be able to walk without being in constant pain. Not being able to walk because of the earth shattering orgasm one thing and is totally diferent than being in pain because our thighs are chaffing.
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4.) Her thighs are not there just to get in the way: You don't just have to rush right in and start going at it like you're starving, kissing a ladies thighs can only go one of two ways- a. it'll turn her on even more or b. she's laugh like crazy cause it tickles, either way its fun so stop using them to prop yourself up. Rub them while you're eating her out, grab them and pull her legs open but just stop pretending like they aren't there. They are an erogenous zone.
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5.) Its not going to break: There are some men who eat pussy like if they get too close or too into it its going to break. You do this too when having sex. If your lady likes it a bit harder during sex she probably wouldn't mind you losing yourself and letting go when your face is in between her legs. Bury your face in there, swim around, come up for air and then dive back in. The vagina is attached. It will not break, it will not come off, it will not need to go in and be redetailed if you bang it up a bit with your mouth so stop treating it like a new Sabb and rough it up a bit. Touch it and act like you love doing it. If you say you love eating pussy then EAT IT don't just taste test it.
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